Saturday 11 August 2018

Ustazah

I feel sorry for people who've had bad experience in the past with their ustaz/ustazah. I personally have never experienced anything significantly bad, however I do remember this one strict but kind ustazah back in high school. When I was in form 4, I left for MRSM but only managed to stay there for 3 weeks. I couldn't handle the pressure (being one of the few second intake students didn't make adapting easier) and we all know what stress does to eczema.

So I went back to my previous school, all happy because I get to be with my friends again in a school close to home. I SO did not miss the prep sessions and crazy amount of schoolwork urgh. The next thing I know, the new gossip in the teacher's room is that there is this one kid who ran away from mrsm. I don’t know the details, but I imagined it wasn’t that the teachers are impressed that the kid left boarding school!



What can I say, life was easy back then. These two ladies on my right are now married with children btw 😎


A teacher even made a PSA during class, "Kalau anak saya la masuk mrsm jangan harapla senang-senang je nak balik semula". She said it while we were doing our math exercises and wasn't talking to me alone, so I replied "Entah siapa lah tu" loudly. The only teacher who bothered asking me the reason I came back was that ustazah. When I told her my reasons, she nodded and walked away. I find it odd back then, why did she even bothered asking? I'm fine being talked about by the teachers, as long as my classmates are cool with me then I'm good. I understood why now.



I was awful at basketball, my friends never really pass me the ball when we play. For some reason I have a medal in my room, can't remember how that happened.

I know it's not easy to simply ignore it when everyone else is gossipping the juiciest stories of that week/month/year. I'm grateful that the ustazah has shown me that it is possible not to engage in such things, eventhough I didn't understand it back then.


Gossiping is fun, trust me, I KNOW. But over the years I find talking about happy things with my friends make me happier. Of course there are times when we need to talk about someone without them knowing, but I think it's a good idea to try keeping our intentions pure and only include details that are pertinent to the conversation. After all, if everyone in this world only care about themselves (kubur sendiri-sendiri mindset), I don't think Allah will be very pleased with us, kan?


💓N

Tuesday 7 August 2018

Kkn - a 2 year old entry


So..my KKN (Kuliah Kerja Nyata, kind of like community service) ended a couple of days ago. I wanted to blog about my 6 weeks being there so I can reminisce about this precious experience of mine, uhm later in life. A lot of things happened in my life that are, well I also cherish but this one is a bit special.


In order to graduate from this university, all degree students are required to undergo 2 months of community service, or as they call it pengabdian kepada masyarakat. I was hoping I'd be placed somewhere close to home but as it turns out, I along with 21 other lucky students were placed in Desa Suroteleng, Boyolali located around 3 hours from UGM. I cried for like 5 days knowing I'd be sent off somewhere far...it's not like I didn't try to get out of it, I even went to see a dermatologist to get a letter stating my allergies and all that, but yeah it made zero difference. Hence on 21st June 2016, off we went.


Ok I'd like to write in rojak from here as it is easier for me and I want to get this done, fast. Subunit aku ada another 4 orang; T (koordinator subunit/kormasit), D, L and A (the only guy). Diorang semua adik2, lagi muda dari aku..so memang dari awal aku perkenalkan diri kat group LINE sebagai mbak/kakak. Aku tak ingat sangat expectation aku kat diorang ni apa, yelah almost 2 bulan duduk sama2 kan, tak mungkin tak risau..yang aku ingat aku selalu doa mintak Allah rapatkan silaturrahim, fahamkan sesama kitorang, lindungi dari sakitkan hati sesama kitorang. Alhamdulillah, Allah tu baik sangat..sampai KKN dah habis ni pun so far hubungan kitorang ok takde problem yg besar lah.


Kitorang berlima menumpang di rumah Pak S..Pak S ni duduk dengan wife, anak, menantu n cucu dia sorang. Memang selesa lah tempat yang disediakan untuk kitorang, siap ada katil lagi dalam bilik (the girls tidur dalam bilik, A tidur luar). Tempat kitorang tinggal tu asalnya gudang tempat Pak S simpan barang2 keperluan tanaman, tapi elok je untuk duduk, dapur memasak pun Pak S sediakan. Masa masuk rumah tu Allah je tahu gembiranya aku masa tu, sebab sebelum pergi tu dengar cakap-cakap kata rumah nanti lantai tanah la, apa la.. So tinggallah kitorang selama 6 minggu di situ. Awalnya susah jugak kitorang kat situ, sebab subunit kitorang takde motor 1 pun..bayangkanla betapa risaunya aku. Nak beli makanan macam mana, beli bahan untuk program macam mana, nak pegi meeting sana sini macam mana..bukannya manja taknak jalan tapi jalan kat kampung tu naik bukit kot, subunit kitorang plak 2 dari atas. Aku as always doa jugak kat Allah, nak motor haha. Tak lama lepas tu A balik jogja ambil motor dia, so ok lah sikit walaupun tetap tak cukup. Alhamdulillah Dia mudahkan kitorang sampai selesai, walaupun aku takde motor sendiri tak pernah lah aku jalan kaki sorang2 sampai kena asthma attack.


Masa kitorang belum ada transport, almost everyday ibu rumah bagi sayur, tempe and macam2 lah untuk kitorang masak. Masa tu bulan puasa some more, tu yang kitorang selalu dapat makanan. Masa awal-awal kat sana tak kenal sangat orang lagi, so tak rajin sangat keluar rumah kalau takde urusan. Aku ingat habis berbuka, solat lepas tu kitorang tengok movie. Semua pakat tak peduli kat laporan haha (memang tak payah pun, most programmes lepas raya baru jalan). Aku ingat lagi the first and the only time the girls solat terawih kat masjid, tercungap-cungap nak kejar imam solat laju gila. Bayangkanla mula isyak pukul 7, 7.30 dah habis terawih 20 rakaat. Esoknya sume tak pergi dah haha (which I kinda regret now, I mean terawih kot..setahun sekali je).


Aku ingat 1 hari tu aku insist nak masak nasi lemak untuk berbuka, so masakla aku dengan harapan please la menjadi dan sedap. Lepas adjust berapa kali entah, tambah air, tambah garam, tambah nasi kosong, tambah santan akhirnya jadi gak nasi lemak ku. Sambal alhamdulillah menjadi jugak, tak la sebanyak liku-liku nak jadi macam nasi dia. Happy aku diorang cakap nasi lemak sedap :) Masa berbuka tu kebetulan Mas T singgah, so diorang paksa dia makan nasi lemak aku hahaha (masa tu aku tak tau pun nama dia, sekarang baru realise aku dah jumpa dia sebelum tu masa round dukuh dengan L). Mas T ni cucu kepada seorang ibu yang friendly sangat, ibu tu remind me of Acik.


Sebelum raya, program aku yang jalan cuma perangkap lalat. First trial guna umpan A, second trial guna umpan B..banyak kali gak aku try tapi result tak memuaskan..so aku delay sampai la lepas raya. Cerita pasal raya, aku, T dan A beraya kat sini, L dan D balik rumah diorang lepas solat raya. Tradisi kat dukuh tu, diorang akan ziarah dari rumah ke rumah dalam group. Ada group remaja, bapak2, ibu2, anak2..obviously kitorang ikut group remaja lah. Sebenarnya malam raya tu aku dah excuse myself dari ikut ziarah tu kat ketua remaja masjid sebab risau kena jalan jauh..dukuh tu besar dan jalan naik bukit kan, aku risau aku tak kuat. Sudahnya aku join jugak sebab tak sedap biarkan T sendiri, dia pun memang nak aku ikut, yelah tak sedap la raya kampung orang pastu buat hal sendiri, tak bercampur kan. Tahu lah aku macam mana awkward, dengan tak paham bahasa jawa lagi memang kerjanya senyum, salam, makan. Group aku ni pulak budak2 lelaki kejap2 bakar mercun..ya Allah yang perempuan ni kejap2 menjerit. Dengan gaya diorang lagi, aku tak tau nak describe macam mana tapi senang cerita kalau kat Malaysia memang aku cop budak2 lelaki ni budak rempit la. Tapi sudahnya yang aku cop rempit ni la yang bawak subunit aku pergi kota Boyolali makan and shopping (Mas A specifically, baru realise bila tengok balik gambar yang T amik masa ziarah tu hahaha). Although saying that aku takdela pandang rendah kat diorang ke apa mula-mula tu, cuma masa tu belum biasa dengan diorang. Dah lama-lama diorang ok je, tapi sebab aku ni memang pendiam and tak reti cakap jawa, aku takdela rapat pun dengan diorang sampai ke sudah, biasa-biasa je. Hopefully diorang tak anggap aku sombong la, huhu.



7 Ogos 2018: As expected, entry ni tak habis tulis dan publish pun..tersadai dalam draft dari 11 Ogos 2016. Ok aku sambung la sikit2 dengan gambar ya, nak cerita banyak2 pun tak ingat sangat dah (malas sebenarnya hehe).




Masa pertama kali pergi kota boyolali..ni la adik2 kesayangan kita 😄




Ni kitorang 1 unit..ni gambar masa ibu koordinator wilayah datang...macam2 drama jadi masa ni




The kids! How can I forget the kids..sangat sopan, comel and superr helpful. Ada lagi gambar dengan adik2 lain tapi tak jumpa pulak dalam external HD. Gambar ni ambil hari sebelum balik jogja rasanya, these kids bagi hadiah kat each one of us 😍



Video bonus. Pergi pekan naik pikap sayur. Best gila dapat keluar kampung for once. Dapat masuk indomaret happy dia macam dapat masuk Hartono Mall!



I miss the kindness, generosity, the smile and the beauty of the people in the village. Was my KKN experience fun? Yeah. Would I do it again? Maybe not, hehe.




💓N